Power

I am in charge of how I feel.

Say it….

Repeat after me…. I AM IN CHARGE OF HOW I FEEL.

Now how do you want to feel today; angry, frustrated, bitter, and powerless? Yeah, I don’t want to feel that way either.

I am choosing to feel strong, confident, beautiful, successful, compassionate, kind, loving, and happy.

I AM CHOOSING HAPPINESS!

I am not going to wait for it to happen. It already has, because I have chosen it, and I have claimed it as mine.

I will not allow others bad attitudes, bad behaviors, or inappropriate comments to have any kind of impact on me today, because I realize the power to be happy is mine, and that power has always belonged to me.

You have this power too.

YOU are in charge of how you feel.

How do you choose to feel today?

The power is yours to decide.

The Power of Yes!

420f Yes leads to new beginnings, risks, successes, and yes, possible failure. Yes requires commitment and follow through while no is an easy word. It requires no commitment and no change. You don’t have to move. You can continue on going through the motions.  Sometimes we say yes when we really want to say no. I did it often because I wanted to please some-one, I didn’t want to let them down etc.. I have been working for months on the word NO

The word no gives me power over my time, my life, my body, and my actions. The word no has taught me to respect my time and me.

I have been thinking about it; and the word yes needs to come back into my vocabulary more. The word yes also gives us power as long as we are making a conscious decision in using the word.  When we say yes, we are making a commitment to follow through. We are making a commitment of ourselves, our time and yes, taking a chance.

I am challenging myself to say yes to new things at least once a day.

I challenge YOU to say yes today…..

Yes to date night….

Yes to that fundraiser….

Yes to that new business opportunity…

Yes to ice-cream for lunch….

Yes to learning a new language

Yes to meeting new people

Yes to listening to your body

Yes to doing that one thing that is just outside your comfort zone

Yes to calling a family member you haven’t spoken too

Yes to a friend who asks for a favor

Yes to forgiving someone that didn’t mean to hurt you

Yes to waking up and getting out of bed today…

Yes to you…

Yes to your dreams…

Yes to taking another breath when it seems like you have no more strength…

Say YES!

Make that conscious decision to move ahead!

Move forward and take that risk….

Yes gives you power too……

Inner Voice

h1.7How often have we spent time trying to be who others want us to be? How much effort do we put into pretending to be who we are not in the hopes for acceptance, love and approval of others?  I am so guilty of this. I have a desire to want everyone to love me; even if that means I am compromising myself.

I find that I am a lot like a ball of play dough. I let others shape me and tell me who I am. The worse part about this is that I believe and trust in those people. I believe the words they say.

My father use to tell me I was fat, ugly, stupid, and a slut. I would grow up to be nothing. He called it “shock therapy.” He would sit me down and berate me in the hopes that somehow this would motivate me to change, but in essence the words made me who I was for so many years.

We all allow the words we hear to shape us and form us. Those words both lift us up and give us confidence or they tear us down and hold us prisoner from our true purpose.  They become the voice we hear when we lay down and close our eyes, the voice we hear when we are all alone with our thoughts, they become our inner voice.

How do we change that voice that haunts us and holds us back?

One thing I have tried to do is look for positives in everything.  I challenge the thoughts and the voice. This morning I looked in the mirror and said, “Ugh I am so fat and ugly. You have to be pretty to make it in this business. I will never make it.”

Okay, yes, I said that as I looked in the mirror before stepping into the shower. I was able to change the dialogue that was falling from my lips and added, “You still have weight to lose, but you have done so good going to the gym. You have muscles where you have never had muscles. You are toning and dropping weight. You look really good for being in your 40’s, you have aged really well.  You have talent. You can touch people’s hearts with your words. You can become the sculptor and not the lump of clay. You can change the world one mind at a time.”

powerful

I can change the world one mind at a time. I can start with mine. I can believe in myself. When I do others will believe in me too. I can hold my head high and be proud of the woman I am and the woman I have become.  I have risen like a phoenix; I just need to be able to fly. I will fly someday. I believe that and I do believe in myself.

I challenge you today to listen to your inner voice. Question what it is saying and telling you. Is that voice lifting you up or holding you prisoner to your past? If you cannot change the dialogue, you cannot grow.  Once you can do this you will find that it is easier to rid yourself of other negative voices in your life that are holding you back with their judgement, their own personal issues, agendas, and their insecurities.

I cannot be who everyone wants me to be, and that is okay; as long as, I am true to being who I really am.

April is Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month

April is Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month.

If you follow my blog you know that this is a hot button topic for me for obvious reasons. As a writer I use my past to help me heal. I pray before I sit down to write that through my work I will reach out and help someone else heal as well.  This is an important ritual for me.  My writing, my words, my thoughts are a gift from above that I am thankful for every day. I will not take advantage of that gift. I will always use it to help others.

In my book Silence the main character Cali is dealing with childhood sexual abuse from a trusted family friend and religious leader. She is also dealing with a rape that occurred while jogging when she was a younger woman. Her husband is violent in bed and believes a man cannot rape his own wife.  It is her duty to fulfill his needs.  Another character in Silence, Adam is dealing with sexual assault from his childhood by a teacher on the reservation.  In the books sequel Deception, Jessie is raped and deals with her emotions and feelings and you learn that Itchy was also sexually assaulted as a child and why he behaves the way he does. These are sub-storylines in a very popular thriller series I have on the market right now, but they are important ones because so many of us are afraid to tell our stories and what has happened or is happening to us right now.

I am leery about posting this; actually I am VERY scared. I recently auditioned to have my book SILENCE featured in a Theatrical Festival where I would read a monologue from it.  I studied theater my first time in college, and I have only used that experience in my work in radio, doing voice overs, and commercials.  Here is my audition and an excerpt from Silence:

In my book Shadows in the Storm the two main characters Chris and Colleen both are dealing with their common link in their past sexual assault.  In Combustion the big secret that Amy and her family are hiding is a rape that resulted in murder and a life gone completely wrong.

Will all of my books deal with rape and sexual assault? No, and they don’t. It is just an issue from my past that I am still working on and trying to come to terms with. Part of you dies the moment your right to say NO is taken away. You never get that part back.  No matter how much glue I use, I will always be broken. I will never be perfect, but are any of us really perfect? We are all slightly damaged from one thing or another. We are all perfectly imperfect; I am learning that about myself as I learn to love myself and forgive myself a little more each day.

RAINN is a fantastic organization. (Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network) They posted a resolution from Congress naming April as Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month.

I just wish Congress would consider doing more, perhaps lifting the statute of limitations on sexual crimes. There is no limitation on murder; why is there on sexual assault?

It takes years sometimes for victims to come to terms with what happened, to be strong enough to talk about it, to be brave enough to say what happened. Why is there a statute of limitations on this vial crime?

I will be blogging more about this as the month goes on.  If you are new to my blog and are curious about my experience, my past… read this blog I wrote: Surviving Life on the Streets

Also make sure to follow me on TWITTER: MizzMercy I will have a lot of information and a lot to say on the topic this month.

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to read this and to support me. Keep your chin up. Be proud of who you are and wear your past, no matter what is in it,  like a badge of honor.

Xoxox Mercy